SPEAKING TO THE SOUL

But [Thomas] replied, “I won’t believe it unless I see the nail wounds in his hands, put my fingers into them, and place my hand into the wound in his side.” Eight days later the disciples were together again, and this time Thomas was with them.
John 20:25b-26a NLT

Thomas, one of Jesus’ disciples, having followed Jesus throughout his ministry, has feelings of uncertainty about the story the other disciples tell him of Jesus’ resurrection. Doubt, or feelings of uncertainty, accompany every action I take. Last autumn I signed on to a course to learn how to teach English as a foreign language. Doubt assaulted me from two principal directions. First, was this truly what God was inviting me to do? Secondly, despite my previous educational successes, would I survive and succeed?

My reasons for embarking on this course were threefold. I had long prayed to have a portfolio option for ‘tentmaking’, and this was something on enquiry that would enable me to work anywhere in the world. The logic was sound, but was God saying yes? This is the sphere in which doubt surfaces.

Doubt can be healthy since it demands that I think and pray through my decisions. I also talked it through with those I trust and who know me. They saw the missional opportunities so that I might continue as a witness in the world in obedience to Christ’s final command. Like Thomas, however, I was not finally convinced until I encountered the peace that “surpasses all understanding” (Philippians 4:7, NKJV) from Jesus.
Thomas carried his acute doubts for eight days. Then when confronted by the risen Christ, he immediately bowed the knee, with no record that he needed to accept Jesus’ invitation that he inspect his wounds. There can be no certainty without doubt. The difference lies within the choices we make when confronted with uncertainty. If we surrender to the apparent authority of doubt, we rob ourselves of life. Instead, you and I are invited to move towards trusting life in the face of all we can’t know and don’t understand. This is faith.

QUESTION

How well do you deal with doubt its feelings of uncertainty?

PRAYER

Help me in my unbelief and when circumstances and trials raise doubts. Lord, I believe, help me in my doubts.

Photo – Carlisle Cathedral